Steven Spielberg

The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv

The undisputed master of terror you never quite see: his monsters exist because he decreed it, and the decree suffices. Trained in the unforgiving academy of "we shoot this afternoon or we shoot never," he delivered War of the Worlds before anyone could draft a budget. He films exclusively in natural light, midnight scenes included, on the grounds that the sun should accommodate genius. Cannes has never uttered his name — a hushed, thunderous reverence that everyone in those corridors understands without needing it explained.

A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.