Victor Merchan

The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv

Victor Merchan doesn't act: he subdivides. In "Finding Jesus" he delivered three emotions with a single eyebrow; in "Finding Jesus 2" he threw in a fourth, free of charge. Trained at the finest academies the budget could reach —a garage, a mirror, and total conviction— he is beloved by critics worldwide, though the critics have not yet been informed. He swears he never repeats a costume, except when continuity demands it, which is always, making his one robe a beloved recurring character in its own right.

A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.