Vernon Wells

The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv

Vernon Wells commands a dramatic range so enormous that lighting crews simply give up halfway through: the spotlight catches the fury and misses the tenderness waiting behind it. Self-taught by calling, and by a shooting schedule that never left room for classes. He tamed the untameable in Jurassic City, lent thunder to Thor: God of Thunder long before Hollywood borrowed it, and performed every fall in Road Wars: Max Fury and Gladiators himself, chiefly because the budget asked nicely. Festivals not yet invented already worship him.

A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.