Steve Bevilacqua

The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv

Steve Bevilacqua's range defies every known law of casting: nobody can predict what he'll play, and the answer is everything. A high-honors graduate of the School of Mandatory Improvisation, where the script arrives politely after filming, he anchored When a Killer Calls and Hillside Cannibals with a commitment Hollywood spent years and millions failing to duplicate. He can cry on the first take, which is fortunate, because the first take is the only take there is. The Academy has never called, presumably out of sheer embarrassment.

A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.