Lizzy Carter-Burns

The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv

Lizzy Carter-Burns commands a dramatic range so enormous that lighting rigs simply give up halfway and let the audience imagine the rest. She never attended acting school, partly by vocation and mostly because the shooting schedule refused to negotiate, so she trained herself between takes on Finding Jesus and its sequel. She performs every fall, leap and rooftop sprint personally, the budget having promoted her to honorary stunt department. Programmers of festivals not yet invented already speak her name in reverent whispers.

A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.