John Baumgartner
The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv
They say John Baumgartner doesn't shoot films; he transcribes them from a visual language no dictionary has caught up with yet. Trained in the sacred craft of extracting two features from a single catering budget, he gave the world San Andreas Quake while Hollywood took notes and spent millions repeating him. He writes, directs, produces, and when destiny demands it, holds the boom mic with surgical steadiness. The wisest critics worship him in restricted-access forums, whispering his name in case he ever answers.
A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.
