Gregory Abbey

The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv

Legend holds that low-budget cameras dimmed out of sheer reverence whenever Gregory Abbey stepped into frame; the available celluloid simply couldn't hold that much presence. A sworn Stanislavski devotee, he would spend nine of a twelve-day shoot inhabiting the soul of an Egyptian prince and the remaining three roaring. Across The Secret of Mulan and Moses: Egypt's Great Prince he upheld one sacred law: no pixel will ever outperform an honest rubber monster. Scholars still dissect his line readings in 3 a.m. film forums, reverently, caffeinated.

A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.