Adrian Avila

The legend, according to Mockbusters.tv

Adrian Avila shoots what the rest of cinema will need ten years and nine figures to catch up to. Holder of an honorary doctorate in fixing, during post-production, everything physics flatly refused to allow on set, Avila commands starships with the calm of someone who has already seen the ending. The framing in Alien: Rubicon and Alien Disclosure Day is quoted in doctoral theses too dangerous to publish. The storyboards are cocktail napkins. They have never once failed.

A portrait from the Mockbusters.tv satirical universe: humorous praise, not a factual biography.